patheticness

I'm pathetic, I admit it. And honestly, I know I'm not good for him. And I know that the distance between us will hurt us more than help. But, I guess your heart doesn't care, does it? It wants what it wants, and even though you know it's not good for you, you still long for what your heart wants most. I guess that's my problem, isn't it? And I don't know how to reconcile my mistakes. Yet, I don't know if I could take the distance, I don't know if I could take it if he shut off from me again. I'm not a good risk-taker, I play it safe to protect myself most times. I took a chance on that relationship and fate seemed to just want to ruin my happiness. In fact, fate took him as far away as possible, made it impossible.
I shouldn't still think about this, I know it's bad for me. But sometimes you just can't help it. Especially when you look around and see everyone else's happiness. People that have the one thing you want, but you've never had the chance to experience fully.
I guess that's life though. You can't win.

- Slipping Mentality

Peaceful

I never actually noticed how peaceful cemetery's were. The quiet, the stillness. It's soothing. Just sitting there, thinking, beside someone you've lost. It feels like they're still there. It feels wholesome, and right. It sit there, talking to thin air, but knowing that they'll listen.
I should go more often, maybe alone next time, so I can talk to Pop. Just talk. Tell him my problems, and my troubles, and feel the burdens slowly slip from my shoulders, flutter away with the cool winding breeze.

- Slipping Mentality

non-fighter

Have you ever felt like everyone was against you? Like, you have to stand on your own because you think no one is there to back you up? No? Well then, you must have a very happy life. I envy you. I envy your happiness. I envy your carefreeness. You've probably never even had a fight with your friends have you? Honestly, I don't fight with my friend either. I don't like fighting of any kind. Even when I don't agree with what's going on, I don't say so. I guess I just don't want friendships to fall apart. Call me a wuss, call me whatever, I don't give a rat's arse. I know I should say stuff, I know I should speak up when I don't agree, but I can't. Because if I speak up and say the wrong thing, then everything will go wrong. It always happens. So instead, I turn around, and argue with myself. I take everything out on myself. And whatever is pent up, I let it go at netball. Why, you say? Because it's who I am I guess. Because I'm a push-over.

Guess i'll just have to survive this way.

- Slipping Mentality

For an almost lost friend

This is a little diddy i wrote a while back for my friend. though now friendships are falling apart, i just really like the message this poem gives.


It's sometimes hard to keep smiling.
To show everyone that your fine,
That you're not hurting inside.
But you do.
You keep smiling.

But you should know
It's okay to be sad, or angry.
It's okay to cry.
You don't have to keep smiling and block the world out.
Someone will always be there to help you through.

Believe in yourself.
Never doubt who you are.
Doubt clouds your vision,
Disbelief withers away your soul.

You shine with a vibrancy unequal to others,
You brighten up peoples days.
Though it may not feel like this to you,
It's true.

Keep your head held high.
Stand up strong.
No one can bring you down.

- Slipping Mentality

Dictionary

Okay, my friends call me a portable dictionary, hey, it's not my fault i know more words than you do, just coz your a dumbass! ;)

so, new
Altruism -noun
1: the principle or practice of unselfish concern for; or devotion to the welfare of others. (opposed to egoism)
2: Animal Behaviour behaviour by an animal that may be to its disadvantage but that n=benefits others of its kind, as a warning cry that reveals the location of the caller to a predator.

Yeah, so dont ask how that came to mind, just be thankful it wasn't filthy sounding like that other word. "fornicate"

- Slipping Mentality

Pretend

I lie awake at night,
Pretending that you're here.
I pretend I can hear you voice,
Gently whispering my name.
I pretend that I'm in your arms,
Feeling warm, and safe, and loved.
I pretend,
That's all I can do.
Because it's the only way you're with me.
For now.
So, I'll keep pretending,
Keep whispering your name
Until you return to me.
That'll be the end of this game.

- Slipping Mentality

really sick of this shit

I'm sick of feeling the way I do.
My family is making me feel small and insignificant, like i can't make my own choices in my own life.

Secondly, I feel like I'm being lied to all the time. I don't know how, and I don't know why, I just do, and it's making me doubt myself. I don't like it. nope, not one bit.



Emotions and feelings are keniving butt holes.

- Slipping Mentality